December 2009
39 posts
I will not have sex with a male flight attendant. Not tonight.
My 7 y/o cousin is so impressed w/himself that he can jump up & down naked & make his pee pee bigger. Its gonna be an interesting holiday.
when life gets you down its time for the Tour de Franzia
Hey guy in front of me in line…Just because you wear a lot of cologne doesn’t mean your hot.
Hello Mr. Pattinson http://yfrog.com/3kgqxp
Flashback to the set of Twilight with @LautnerDTaylor http://yfrog.com/4fpodcp
#titlesthatcanbeporn “Holes”
Wheres the money Lebowski…
It’s a Girl!! Gianna Rizzo. 7lb 1oz. Time to go be the cool aunt. http://yfrog.com/3nasjcj
Laying on the couch, with a fire going, a glass of wine, watching risky business……
Brittany Murphy supposedly died this morning…. http://bit.ly/64W2p2
#titlesthatcanbeporn Babes in Toyland
Diamonds on my neck d-diamonds on my grill
I’m certain that if Jay-Z and Rachel Maddow had a baby, that would pretty much be the coolest kid ever.
#FF @michaelowenhill @alittlelamb @kellylabanco @tauriam @slowprincess
Airport bathrooms always creep me, mostly because they’re notorious for being homosexual buisness men hangouts…
http://twitpic.com/tvf2j - So today is 90’s day at yoga. I only had this shirt. But he was born in the 90’s. So it works.
Back to the DeLorean!
You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive. Thanks LA.
Getting ready to go see Avatar. Really hope its all its talked up to be.
I want a little gizmo of my own.
Up way to early. I guess now would be a great time to watch gremlins. Score.
Up way to early. Avatar premier tomorrow. Funky fresh…
Zoot suits are prohibited.
sadly…my night requires pants…
The room I’m in looks like its been molested by a unicorn for the past few years.
Life would be easier if you could mark people as spam.
Listen kids, money’s tight. So when I make you balloon animals you should say ‘thank you’ and not complain about the lubricant.
What’s the difference between Santa Claus and Tiger Woods?… Santa Claus stopped at 3 Ho’s
Can’t tell what’s what anymore on this rotisserie chicken, dinner shouldn’t be a goddamn guessing game.
I was so wrong for thinking the moonwalk was the quietest way to sneak out of a bedroom.
Anyone know of a nice little cozy place to move in LA?
Everybody’s broke, so here’s the rule for Christmas this year; if you still shit your pants, you get a present. Otherwise tough shit.
Just got asked to join the boones farm fan club…….no
12 days till I get some Jersey lovin.
Christmas shopping for people who probably just deserve coal…
#ifsantawasblack ho ho ho would take on a totally different meaning.
August 2009
23 posts
Fresh air, Green grass, sunny days, I LOVE EVERYTHING ABOUT GOLF!!
Oh yeah, except the asinine aspect of smacking a tiny ball and then chasing after it EIGHTEEN TIMES. =]
The road to hell...
…is paved with the best intentions
Dreams
Not like anybody is really going to read this whole story anyway, but here it goes. I rarely have dreams that I can remember. But when I do I can never seem to make sense of them. The other morning I woke up and took a little time to sit and remember the whole thing.
I was at a good friend of mines house, and it was time for me to go hoe so I left. I walked down the street I always walk...
Word
I used to not want to wake up because my dreams were so great. Now I can’t wait to wake up because my dreams can’t compete with my life.
So I, Sara Michael, have made the executive decision to not care anymore. Because you know what’s cooler than thinking about things that frustrate you all of the time? Thinking about ice cream and ribbon dancers and walking around barefoot.
The end. Moving on.
My fun facts...
1. I believe that dolls come alive at night.
2. There is a child somewhere wearing my long hippie hair thanks to Locks of Love.
3. I love makeup and fashion. But I hate wearing makeup and looking fashionable.
4. I glow under blacklights thanks to my tats.
5. I did photography for the Minnesota Twins.
6. I spent a total of 4 months in the hospital due to an ingrown hair an now have a sweet...
